Every year January and February come around like clockwork. It’s weird, December ends and suddenly… BAM! January is slapping you in the face like, “Guess what! You get to start the year all over!” But isn’t that amazing? Every year we get the chance to start new, start fresh, and try everything again! Maybe the previous year you missed some opportunities in April. Guess what? April is going to come again and you’ll get another chance. Maybe you didn’t feel you had enough time to do something special in September. That’s coming again, too! Faster than you expect.
But every January and February, life seems a little slower. I don’t know if it’s the colder weather, the amount of time we spend inside, or maybe because we are more likely to get sick so we spend more time in bed. Whatever the reason, these months just creep by in a way that makes you sit up and take closer notice of the days.
January and February are home to two particular holidays that I think are really quite special. No, I’m not talking about New Year’s Day and Valentine’s Day. And definitely more important that Groundhog day. I mean really, does a groundhog really need his own day? And though Ash Wednesday is certainly important, it does not consistently fall in February.
No. I’m referring to the holidays that celebrate the leaders in our country. The men who have stood up for injustice, stood up for equality, and stood up for truths that they felt ignored, misrepresented, and not freely given.
So I did a little bit of research on Martin Luther King Day when preparing for this blog post. I hope this surprises and hurts your heart as much as it did mine when I read it – Martin Luther King Day was only officially recognized in all 50 states in 2000. That was only 20 years ago.
Martin Luther King, Jr. Day and President’s Day sometimes slide through the cracks. They are representative of when kids have a day off of school and when there are great sales in the stores.
This year, though, I want to use these days to talk about how to raise a future leader. How can we use these men as models for how our children can be future leaders. They didn’t necessarily have the same leadership style. And yet, these men we celebrate on the third Mondays of January and February helped shape America to what it is today.
By looking into these three leaders, their leadership styles, and how they made change in a world that wasn’t always accepting of them and their thoughts, we can learn how to raise our little ones to be future leaders in their own ways. We can learn how to encourage them to speak for those who are afraid to speak, to stand up for those who have been pushed down, and to hold true to the values that we have instilled in them.
The Leadership of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
If there is one thing that stands out about Martin Luther King, Jr., it’s his amazing power of speech. Individuals remember that he would quietly listen to others and their problems and concerns, and then having speeches that awed and inspired. To this day, “I have a…” is instinctively followed with “dream.”
But his way with words was not limited to his speeches. One of the things that made him a great leader was his ability to listen and comprehend the opinions and feelings of others. Accounts say that in meetings with small groups of people, he would sit back and listen while the others talked or argued. Then once things had calmed, he would summarize the debate points and create a way forward for the group.
With this ability to read people, King had an ability to escalate as well as de-escalate situations. A leader has the respect and ability to modify their approach according to what is best for the situation, not based on the whims of the individuals. Sometimes it can be difficult to not submit to every feeling, but leaders know that to achieve the overall goal, not every approach will work. Sometimes you have to stop the way you are currently going, turn around, and try again a different way.
If we want to use Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. as a model for how to raise a future leader, we should teach our children to listen and understand before they speak and judge. We should teach our children that leaders don’t always succeed on their first tries, and that sometimes we have to stop and try a different way. We should teach our children that words matter. What we say and how we say them can have a lasting impact, and we should use that power very carefully as a leader and as a human.
The Leadership of President George Washington
The individuals who we choose to surround ourselves with have a great deal of influence over our beliefs and our leadership style. President Washington chose specific individuals to surround him who gave him a variety of opinions, were knowledgeable in a variety of subjects, and some who were even better educated than he was. From Jefferson and Adams to Patrick Henry and Hamilton, these other men provided insights to Washington. And even more importantly, Washington respected them and asked for their opinions. He was not the solitary man leading our country, but rather a great man who asked for the opinions he valued from the men he surrounded himself with.
Washington had a huge job as the first president of the United States. He wasn’t at the signing of the Declaration of Independence – he was busy fighting a war! In fact, according to sources from Mount Vernon, he had to be convinced to even attend the Constitutional Convention. But as president, he helped guide and form how our executive branch functions today.
As both a general and a president, Washington had an amazing power to organize individuals towards a greater goal. His ability to have a certain, distinct vision and guide individuals towards that vision was one of the things that made him a leader. Leaders, such as Washington, are visionary towards a particular goal. All of their actions, both great and small, are on that path towards obtaining that goal. If we look at Washington’s ultimate goal as liberty for the colonists, then every action, from leading the armies in the Revolutionary War to becoming the only president to be unanimously elected, were distinct actions made towards that goal.
If we want to use President George Washington as a model for how to raise a future leader, we should encourage our children to seek friendships will all kinds of people – those who look just like them and think just like them as well as those who don’t. We should encourage them to seek opinions from those who are older and younger. We should encourage them to think about what the other person is saying and teach them to consider all possibilities. We should teach our children how to ask for help, showing them that leaders don’t always have the answers, but that they can find others who may be able to help them on the path of their goals. We should teach our children that others may have the same goals and visions they do, but respecting them can create a stronger group, more able to obtain their wildest dreams.
The Leadership of President Abraham Lincoln
President Lincoln had an overwhelming kindness about him. His humanitarian personality was one of the attributes that led him to accomplish so much as a person and as a president. Not only did he have a keen sense of empathy and ability to place himself in anyone’s position, friend or foe, but his calm, even temperament often expressed fairness and kindness to others.
There are many examples through conversations and speeches with Lincoln where, though he may have disagreed with the actions of the residents of the southern states or others, he acknowledged their history in a magnanimous way. Lincoln himself said, “In order to win a man to your cause, you must first reach his heart, the great high road to his reason.”
And though Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. is the man known for his words, we can’t discredit the communication skills of President Lincoln. After all, there’s a whole style of debate named for him. In particular, Lincoln had a skill to humanize himself. It may have been based on his background, but he was able to make himself seem equal to those around him even though he held the highest office in the country. He spoke from the heart and, in doing so, was able to convince others of the same convictions he felt.
If we want to use President Abraham Lincoln as a model for how to raise a future leader, we should encourage our children to be kind and not hold power over others. We should teach them to see other’s perspectives, even though we may disagree with them. We should show them that it is ok to be human, to struggle at times, and to work hard to achieve the goals we set for ourselves. To raise a future leader, we should encourage our children to communicate from their hearts. We should show our future leaders that empathy is essential.
I have a responsibility as a parent to teach my kids to speak in the silence, to fight for those who feel lost or ignored, and to give of themselves, remembering that God loves all of us regardless of our skin color, our beliefs, and who we love.
There is never a wrong time to do what is right. There is never a wrong time to show kindness. There is never a wrong time to show love.
It is important to remember and honor people like Martin Luther King, Jr., President Washington, and President Lincoln more often than just one day a year, but everyday through our words and our actions. Do not let the remembering and influence as we grow our little ones to be future leaders be limited to one or two days a year.