There are few things more tiring than a child who keeps responding to your answers with “Why?” There is a point where you just run out of answers. Do you make something up? Do you just keep coming up with answers, sometimes pretending you know the answer? Do you admit you don’t know and hope they don’t come back asking why you don’t know?
Though annoying, this sense of curiosity is something that we want to encourage in our children. We don’t want them to lose that sense of wonder and desire to be a lifelong learner. So the question becomes – how do we encourage this without the continuous “whys”?
1. Encourage independently learning the answers.
At the end of a long day, sometimes it’s just easier to answer my child’s questions. It’s easier to just provide them with what they want to know and move on to the next thing. What isn’t always easy is helping our children discover the answers on their own.
To do so, we can’t just shuffle them along and tell them to go find out on their own. We should hold their hand, so to speak, and work with them to find the answer. Sit with them and brainstorm where you might find the answer, what book topics you might need to find, and, as they get older, show them how to use other resources, such as the internet, to find the answers. While not providing them with the answers, we can guide them on how to find them, encouraging their independence and desire to learn.
2. Read, read, read.
There is nothing that can encourage learning quite like a book. With the variety of children’s books out there, you can find a good book on almost any topic. Not only should you encourage reading, but encourage reading all different kinds of books – fiction and nonfiction, historical and fantasy. Guiding them in book choices as well as encouraging picking some independently will develop their love of reading.
3. Set up situations for discovery.
Setting up situations for discovery can be as simple as going to the park or the museum. Allowing their curiosity to run wild, letting them choose the path and guide where you go, will set them up for situations of discovery. When kids take an active role in their learning, they become more engaged, more prone to follow through on finding the answers, and more likely to remember what they learned.
It may seem counter-intuitive to provide them with more reasons to ask why. But instead, these situations for discovery provide the perfect opportunity for you, as the parent, to encourage learning the answers independently as well as to model the behavior of a learner. If they start to ask why, redirect and respond with a deeper, investigative question. Doing this will encourage learning at their pace and give them the independence they often crave.
4. Model the behavior of a learner.
When we want our children to learn a new behavior, we model it for them regularly. We say please and thank you, we cover our mouths when we sneeze or cough, and we pray before meals and at bedtime. In that same way, it’s no surprise that one of the best ways to encourage lifelong learning in our children is to model this behavior for them.
We should have them see us asking deeper, investigative questions. We should demonstrate searching out the answers. We should ask them questions that delve into their thoughts and beliefs. Modeling these behaviors will show them positive ways to develop their desire to learn.
5. Explore new everything.
Whether it’s exploring a new recipe, trying a new craft or hobby, or playing a new sport, trying new things with your kids will encourage them to continue to learn and try the unknown. Make it a goal to choose new things together. Give them an opportunity to have input in the choice. Doing these things together will not only encourage their passion for learning, but will also strengthen your bond together, creating memories that they can call back to throughout their lives.
Using these five tips may not stop the continuous why questions. Our children will still have moments where they find humor in the incessant questions and watching us try to come up with never-ending answers. But by incorporating these fives items, we can encourage our children to learn, to explore, and to never-stop wondering.